[ won't someone take either of them out? it is more cruel to be left alive now. cast annihilation!!!
there is some understanding, but it's accompanied by some kind of turmoil. ]
It is, and it isn't. You'd be leaving Mr. Astarion to feel as you feel now, but I do - understand. To save someone you love, to take their place. To want them to live instead of you, if you had to choose.
[ even if they know they can reach them with letters, it does not take that pain away. ]
It was the choice I made. That I had been convinced was correct. Before I arrived here I thought it would be the most simple and logical choice, that I would detonate the Orb, and trade my life for-- well. Everyone. The entire Sword Coast.
And now it feels that I have made a selfish choice, and fate has seen to punish me for that thought.
It is a selfish choice to leave even if it is for selfless reasons. I've come to think that, too, with something that I chose at home.
[ she cuts herself off because it's still fresh to her and darkens her mood, but she closes her eyes and tries to refocus. ]
But - don't think you are punished. Please... it's not your fault. Wanting to save people isn't wrong. It is only... sometimes, you don't realize how people left behind feel.
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there is some understanding, but it's accompanied by some kind of turmoil. ]
It is, and it isn't. You'd be leaving Mr. Astarion to feel as you feel now, but I do - understand. To save someone you love, to take their place. To want them to live instead of you, if you had to choose.
[ even if they know they can reach them with letters, it does not take that pain away. ]
I'd wish it, too.
no subject
And now it feels that I have made a selfish choice, and fate has seen to punish me for that thought.
no subject
[ she cuts herself off because it's still fresh to her and darkens her mood, but she closes her eyes and tries to refocus. ]
But - don't think you are punished. Please... it's not your fault. Wanting to save people isn't wrong. It is only... sometimes, you don't realize how people left behind feel.
[ until you feel it yourself. ]